You may have noticed as you strolled down Broadway between 113th and 114th Streets that Goldmine Jewelers, whose sign simply says "Jewelers," is closing after three decades in Morningside Heights. The signs in the windows encourage shoppers to stop by. "Everything must be sold to the bare walls," and "Big Discounts," lure customers inside, where they see showcases of jewelry up to 60 percent off.

But the ultimate fate of the shop is not known, even to the people who work there. One employee, who wished to remain nameless, said that the store is not closing. Instead, "It's being renovated." Another employee, "Mickey," suggested that she did not know when or if the store was closing, but finally said that if it were to close, it would be "somewhere in April."

In a phone interview, store owner Maurice Paredes said that ownership of the business would not change, but that there is a "99 percent chance" that he would turn the space into a "high-end nail salon," with waxing and spa services. Paredes made it clear that he wanted to maintain the full service jewelry shop, but that Columbia University, his landlord, "has the last word" on businesses, and what the community apparently needs is a nail salon.

"My customers don't want me to go," maintained Paredes, who has owned the business for all of its 30 years. He added that his customers "don't mind traveling" to his other store, located on Amsterdam at 72nd Street, to make purchases, but that the present Morningside Heights location provides services that Paredes said cannot be found in the area, such as replacing watch batteries and bands, free cleaning, and a service that he had hoped to implement soon, ear piercing.

Paredes also said that he is in talks with Columbia University to continue to provide some of his jewelry services out of the store even if he turns it into a nail salon. What he has in mind, he said, is just "essentials," perhaps a "rotating display" of watches and jewelry at the reception desk as a means to continue to provide service with the "30 years of experience." Although, as Paredes stated, the University has asked him to turn the store into a nail salon, he maintains that the University "[has] been good to us, it [works] with us."

There is no doubt that the University and Paredes have been working together the past 30 years throughout Goldmine Jewelers' numerous changes. The business started off on the corner of Broadway and 112th Street in a small space, but "Columbia wanted something bigger," says Paredes, who moved with the business to 110th Street. "We died for six years," Paredes said about the 110th Street location, adding that in order to see a lot of traffic, "you gotta be on Broadway." For the past "eight to 10 years" Goldmine Jewelers has occupied its present location at 2901 Broadway, where Paredes admits "we've done well, but times are changing."

"Service, service, service, service, that's what we're there for, that's how we built the place," Paredes said. Lee Spencer, a Morningside Heights resident of 15 years would agree. She said she is "sad to see it going," calling the jewelry store a shop that has "provided a nice service in the neighborhood for many years."

columbiaspectator.com

Twelve-year-old Tori Swanson's middle school success may not rest on English, social studies and math. It could depend on a tiny diamond that adorns the right side of her nose.

For now, Tori isn't attending sixth grade at Bailey Middle School at all. She's serving a three-day suspension. And, says principal Judy Pippen, she'll be suspended again - and again - unless the nose stud goes.

Pippen said facial piercings - in the nose, lip, tongue, eyebrow or anywhere else - are distractions from the business of learning.



"We are here for a student's education," Pippen said. "Any detractors are not acceptable. Our school is an A school, and it's going to stay that way."

The whole fiasco began during spring break.

Tori's dad, Tony Benson, took her and her 13-year-old friend Breyanne Day to have their noses pierced. Tori's mom, Lori Swanson, didn't know about the excursion and at first was more than a little bit displeased.

But no longer.

Lori Swanson, 29, a legal assistant, said she'll fight for her daughter to stay in Bailey, filing a lawsuit if necessary.

"At first I thought she was too young," Swanson said. "But I got to looking, and it's kind of cute. It's not hurting her."

Tori doesn't understand all the furor about her latest piercing. She had her belly button pierced two years ago.

"It should be up to me. It's not a distraction to anyone else," she said.

Especially irritating to Swanson is that her daughter's frienid Breyanne is sporting her nose stud with impunity at Brownsville Middle School.

"All Escambia County children should be treated equally," Swanson said. "They should all have the same rights."

The Student Rights and Responsibilities Handbook states that students are not allowed to wear clothing or jewelry that is "disruptive, offensive, suggestive or indecent."

Determining what that is, however, is left up to school principals.

Assistant Superintendent Norm Ross stands behind Pippen's decision.

"In my opinion, the majority of parents and PTAs agree with the principal's stance with regard to anything that's going to cause a distraction," Ross said. "The principal should have the autonomy to make that decision. It disturbs me that parents would not support the administrators on those types of issues."

Brownsville Principal Sandra Rush said that nose rings, while not a big trend at the school, are not a distraction.

"Unless something is going to endanger a child's health, or kids could pull or hurt the child, I don't see anything wrong with it," Rush said. "Most kids aren't paying attention to that kind of stuff. It's us adults. It drives us crazy."

School Board member Gary Bergosh said the flexibility in the district's policy allows school communities to define what they think is acceptable for middle school students.

"We give great discretion to principals, and the principals ascertain what community standards are going to be," said Bergosh, who represents District 1, which includes Bailey. "Here, they have agreed that any kind of unique piercing is disruptive."

Throughout Escambia County, principals' standards differ.

At Ransom Middle School, it is determined on a case-by-case basis whether a piercing causes a disruption, said Principal Richard Harper.

At Warrington Middle, facial piercings aren't allowed, but students can wear clear plastic stays to keep the hole open during the school day, said Administrative Dean Gary Loggins.

In Santa Rosa County, the policy is similar, and individual schools can add more-specific dress codes.

Assistant Principal Buddy Powell said the jewelry is banned at Hobbs Middle School in Milton, but facial piercings haven't been an issue because they are not as popular with students as they were a few years ago.

"When we tell them they need to remove it, usually the parents are on our side, anyway," Powell said.

Gulf Breeze Middle School Principal Jennifer Granse allows the piercings so long as they don't cause a distraction - and thus far, they haven't, she said.

"There is nothing in the code (of student conduct) about facial piercings," she said. "But it's hard for us to keep up with the kids and what's coming."

For now, Tori doesn't plan on removing the stud.

"If it does become a problem, I would want everyone else in the district to take theirs out," Tori said. "But I hope I can keep it in and keep going to Bailey."

pensacolanewsjournal.com

The state Court of Appeals has affirmed the conviction of an Albuquerque shop owner who offered free nipple piercing if customers underwent the procedure in the store's window.

In 2002, Renee Sachs was convicted of violating Albuquerque's ordinance banning nudity in a public place. She received a 90-day deferred sentence.

In a 3-0 ruling Tuesday, the Appeals Court also upheld the constitutionality of the city's public nudity ban.

Sachs' attorney, Jeffrey Dempsey of Albuquerque, said his client would continue with her legal challenge by asking the court to rehear the case or petition the state Supreme Court to review the ruling.

Sachs ran an advertisement two years ago promoting the free nipple piercing. The first customer to undergo the procedure in the shop's window was a man and the second was a woman.

When police arrived at the tattoo and body piercing shop, a woman was sitting in the window exposing her breasts as she had her nipples pierced. Several people on the sidewalk were watching.

Sachs was convicted of violating the city's ordinance that bans nudity in public and prohibits store owners from allowing people to be nude in a public place of business.

The Appeals Court ruled that the ordinance did not violate the Equal Rights Amendment of the New Mexico Constitution or the state's Human Rights Act, which prohibits gender-based discrimination.

In her appeal, Sachs contended that the ordinance was unconstitutional because it discriminated against women by prohibiting the public exposure of a female breast but not a male breast. She also argued that the ordinance forced her to offer body piercing services in a way that discriminated on the basis of sex.

The court disagreed.

"The city ordinance does not prohibit public nudity of women while allowing public nudity by men," the court said in an opinion written by Judge Michael Vigil. "It recognizes that females and males have different anatomies, so the objective is accomplished in a nondiscriminatory manner."

The court also concluded that nipple piercing is not a form of expression protected by the First Amendment.

"The Court of Appeals found that the city nudity ordinance did not operate to the disadvantage of women. We disagree with that," said Dempsey. "For example, if it had said that Caucasian people can take their shirts off and all others cannot, it seems hard for me to see how that would not operate to the disadvantage of people of color. We think this is the same thing."

seattlepi.nwsource.com

Anyone looking for a smoking gun in last week's public hearings by the panel investigating the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, was bound to be let down. In a sense, it is more a relief than a disappointment to learn that no single individual, no singular failure appears to be responsible for the catastrophe.

But even so, for one brief moment, the hearings pierced the veil of bureaucratic secrecy that envelops issues of national security, and what the public was allowed to see wasn't pretty.

Not an urgent issue

The intelligence community was drowning in sinister ''chatter'' from terrorist sources, yet no ''actionable intelligence'' could be found to justify an attack on al Qaeda. The Clinton administration thought it had approved the elimination of Osama bin Laden, but somehow field agents didn't think that they had authority to act accordingly. The Bush White House rebuffed a proposal in early 2001 to support anti-Taliban rebels in Afghanistan, yet no other force was available to take on bin Laden's protectors.

Most troubling was the failure of both the Clinton and Bush administrations to appreciate the urgent nature of the threat. According to a commission staff report, much was known about the horrible ambitions of bin Laden as early as 1996, but this failed to ring the appropriate alarm bells. As President Bush's former counterterrorism chief, Richard A. Clarke, testified, the current administration ''considered terrorism an important issue, but not an urgent issue.'' Until 9/11.

Mr. Clarke wasn't the only witness to offer that view. Deputy CIA Director John E. McLaughlin said much the same. The furious counterattack mounted against Mr. Clarke, however, is a reminder that, in Washington, politics trumps the most grievous national security concerns -- particularly in an election year.

It is especially unbecoming for the national security advisor, Condoleezza Rice, to offer to ''refute'' Mr. Clarke's testimony in private when she refuses to appear publicly under oath herself -- all the while appearing virtually nonstop on television. The principle she purports to protect -- that staff assistants to the president at her level are shielded from giving compelled testimony under oath by Congress -- is valid. Ms. Rice, however, fails to appreciate the great value of these hearings: a public exposition of how the U.S. government at the highest levels failed to deal with the clear and present danger of terrorism until the call went out for body bags at Ground Zero.

Plenty of blame

The public should withhold judgment about all the issues surrounding the events of 9/11 until the panel publishes its final report in July, but some things are already clear. Among these is that the failure crossed party lines and administrations. It involved officials at many levels in a variety of agencies and includes the denizens of the permanent government who inhabit Washington regardless of who's in office.

''Your government failed you,'' Mr. Clarke told the families of the victims of 9/11. There's plenty of blame to go around, but at least he accepted a measure of responsibility for his own role. It is a revealing illustration of character, integrity and courage that others aren't willing to do the same.

miami.com

The sponsor of a bill that would ban the mutilation of female genitalia says she will seek today to remove from the measure the unrelated issue of piercing.

Sen. Renee Unterman (R-Loganville), who sponsored the original bill on mutilation, said she will disagree with a House amendment that would make it illegal for women voluntarily to pierce their genitalia.

"I think it is not the original intent of the legislation," Unterman said. "It was to prevent the circumcision of young girls. The consequences of that is so much greater than an elective procedure."

If the Senate agrees with Unterman, and unless the House later decided to forgo the piercing amendment, the bill would go to a conference committee to try to resolve the differences.

The amendment sponsored by Rep. Bill Heath (R-Bremen) did not include men.

Unterman, a registered nurse and social worker, said that if she were doing a bill on piercing she would attack the tongue first, because it poses more health risks.

In any case, she said, a piercing bill should be separate from a mutilation bill.

The amended bill passed the House 160-0 without discussion. But this week, several House members said they were confused about what they actually voted on.

Heath, who could not be reached for comment, told The Associated Press immediately after last week's vote that he was surprised that some women actually had their genitals pierced.

Unterman said she has gotten thousands of e-mails from around the world on Heath's amendment.

Mutilation "is something that lasts them the rest of their lives," Unterman said. "It is such a huge, huge issue for young girls, and to tack on something that is pretty frivolous like this is wrong to me."

Meredith Vansickle, a local piercer, says she does a genital piercing almost every day.

This afternoon, Vansickle and dozens of other piercers will meet at the state Capitol to protest the bill that they say affects not only their pocketbooks but also the lifestyles and freedoms of women.

"At this moment, I do not have any piercings below the waist, but if this bill passes, I will definitely do it in protest," said Vansickle, whose 13 piercings include her ears, lip, tongue and navel.

Bethra Szumski, the Atlanta-based national president of the Association of Professional Piercers, said her colleagues around the world have been outraged by the amendment and the link it is drawing between piercings and mutilations.

"No harm is caused to anyone; it is not a right-to-life issue," Szumski said. "This is about a woman's right to have ornaments. It is a very dangerous to pass judgment on women."

Szumski said about 10 percent of her business at Virtue and Vice on Cheshire Bridge Road is genital piercings. One of the main reasons for getting pierced is to increase sexual pleasure, she said.

ajc.com

Genital piercings for women were banned by the Georgia House Wednesday as lawmakers considered a bill outlining punishments for female genital mutilation.

The bill would make such mutilation punishable by two to 20 years in prison. It makes no exception for people who give consent to have the procedure performed on their daughters out of religious or cultural custom.

An amendment adopted without objection added "piercing" to the list of things that may not be done to female genitals. Even adult women would not be allowed to get the procedure. The bill eventually passed 160-0, with no debate.

Amendment sponsor Rep. Bill Heath, R-Bremen, was slack-jawed when told after the vote that some adults seek the piercings.

"What? I've never seen such a thing," Heath said. "I, uh, I wouldn't approve of anyone doing it. I don't think that's an appropriate thing to be doing."

The ban applies only to women, not men. The bill has already been approved by the Senate but now must return to that chamber because of the piercing amendment. Both chambers of the Legislature must agree on a single version of a bill before it can go to the governor for final approval.

The state Court of Appeals has affirmed the conviction of an Albuquerque shop owner who offered free nipple piercing if customers underwent the procedure in the store's window.
In 2002, Renee Sachs was convicted of violating Albuquerque's ordinance banning nudity in a public place. She received a 90-day deferred sentence.


In a 3-0 ruling Tuesday, the Appeals Court also upheld the constitutionality of the city's public nudity ban.

Sachs' attorney, Jeffrey Dempsey of Albuquerque, said his client would continue with her legal challenge by asking the court to rehear the case or petition the state Supreme Court to review the ruling.

Sachs ran an advertisement two years ago promoting the free nipple piercing. The first customer to undergo the procedure in the shop's window was a man and the second was a woman.

When police arrived at the tattoo and body piercing shop, a woman was sitting in the window exposing her breasts as she had her nipples pierced. Several people on the sidewalk were watching.

Sachs was convicted of violating the city's ordinance that bans nudity in public and prohibits store owners from allowing people to be nude in a public place of business.

The Appeals Court ruled that the ordinance did not violate the Equal Rights Amendment of the New Mexico Constitution or the state's Human Rights Act, which prohibits gender-based discrimination.

In her appeal, Sachs contended that the ordinance was unconstitutional because it discriminated against women by prohibiting the public exposure of a female breast but not a male breast. She also argued that the ordinance forced her to offer body piercing services in a way that discriminated on the basis of sex.

The court disagreed.

"The city ordinance does not prohibit public nudity of women while allowing public nudity by men," the court said in an opinion written by Judge Michael Vigil. "It recognizes that females and males have different anatomies, so the objective is accomplished in a nondiscriminatory manner."

The court also concluded that nipple piercing is not a form of expression protected by the First Amendment.

"The Court of Appeals found that the city nudity ordinance did not operate to the disadvantage of women. We disagree with that," said Dempsey. "For example, if it had said that Caucasian people can take their shirts off and all others cannot, it seems hard for me to see how that would not operate to the disadvantage of people of color. We think this is the same thing."

There were seven complaints to local medical offices about botched and infected body piercings last year, but no one is sure if any of the faulty procedures were performed at licensed businesses in Ocean City.
During the summer of 2003, the Worcester County Health Department received seven complaints about botched or infected body piercings, up one from the previous year, through six medical offices and Atlantic General Hospital.

Three of the reports received by the health department did not name the piercing establishment. Two noted that the jobs were performed outside of Worcester County and two were done by friends.

Most of the patients were teen-agers, including three 16-year olds and one 17-year-old. The other two patients were ages 21 and 31.

Three of seven complaints were related to infection, but one was questionable and not further investigated. Another complaint was about bleeding from the pierced site; one questioned the location of the piercing and one involved skin healing over the jewelry.

Of the seven cases, four were severe enough to warrant the patients visiting the doctor?s office, two required follow-up medical attention and one needed surgical intervention. Only one case required a repeat office visit.

Three reports were received in June, three in July and one in August. Doctors treating the patients said the piercings ranged from the same day to four months old.

Last year only 10 businesses, down three from the previous year, were permitted by the health department to perform body piercing. All of the shops were located in Ocean City. Of the 13 that had permits in 2002, only nine renewed and one existing facility was re-permitted under new ownership. No new businesses were permitted.

"Our number of establishments hasn?t been going up. It?s actually been decreasing a little," Debbie Goeller, county health officer, said.

Just 13 piercers were licensed last year, down from 16 in 2002. Only 11 of those licensed in 2002 renewed their permits for 2003 and two new piercers were permitted.
Of the five who gave up their licenses, three left the area, one had the license revoked and one just didn?t reapply.

Six of the people licensed last year were permitted to pierce in more than one shop, more than in the two previous seasons. In some cases, the piercers were working for the same business owner at multiple establishments.

The health department received complaints about two unlicensed piercers, one in Berlin and one in Pocomoke, who were allegedly piercing underage patrons using unsafe practices. However no action was taken because the people were not willing to name the piercers or act as witnesses.

One person also alleged that there was an unpermitted Boardwalk business offering piercing. The Ocean City Police Department investigated but could not verify the complaint.

Two complaints were about improper practices, not providing proper post piercing information, in piercing shops in the Boardwalk. The were also investigated and determined to be unfounded

Another complaint alleging improper practices at a shop could not be investigated because the woman admitted that she was so intoxicated before and during the procedure that she couldn?t remember where she was pierced.

One business and piercer were each suspended by the health department for 10 days in June for piercing an underage patron. Another business and piercer were suspended for 10 days in July for piercing an underage person as well as not getting copies of identification for nine patrons. A third business and piercer each received 20-day suspensions in September for piercing two underage people in August.

The Worcester County Commissioners agreed on March 16 to keep the body piercing permit and license fees the same for the coming year at $590 for an individual piercer license and $ 2,945 for the establishment permit. Goeller said costs for administering the program have remained relatively unchanged.

In order to coordinate the permit year with the county?s fiscal year, Geoller recommended extending the life of the permits and licenses for this year only from 12 to 15 months.

Health officials conducted 53 routine inspections of the permitted businesses through October and made 85 additional visits for various reasons, such as spore testing of sterilization equipment prior to reopening for the season, dissemination of information, retesting after a business failed a test, facility walk-throughs and investigations.

Sixty-four spore tests were conducted and only one piece of equipment failed. The test was repeated and the equipment passed.

Worcester County adopted its skin penetrating body adornment code in April 2001. The health department handles the permitting and licenses, keeps an out of for medical issues and investigations complaints.

Wor-Wic Community College provides the required training for new piercers through a health and safety course for practitioners.

Body piercing is very popular among young people these days but parents wonder who is wathcing out to make sure it's done right and safely.

Right now, nobody is, but that's about to change.

Anyone can perform body piercing in Kentucky without registering with state health officials and there's no safeguards to stop anyone from performing piercings on minors but starting Thursday the state is cracking down and legitimate piercing parlors said they couldn't be happier.

Chelsie Iscoe considers herself a piercing expert.

She is a professional body peircer at Mother's in Covington and has perfromed hundreds of piercings, it is something she takes very seriously.

"Pretty much you're taking somebody else's life in your hands and your own as well," said Iscoe.

Kentucky health officials agree. That's why starting Thursday, they're requiring the registration and certification of all piercing studio's and body piercers.

Even if you're just getting you're ears pierced health officials said you should now make sure that business is certified.

"There are diseases that can result from piercing operations, anytime the skin is broken," said John Merkle, Kenton County Health Department.

"Everything touching you today is coming out of sterile packaging. Here's my little indicators showing you that everything has been properly cleaned," said Iscoe.

Piercing studios will have to display proof of registration and undergo inspections, health officials will check to make sure facilities are kept clean and safe and equipment is sterilized.

"If they're not pulling out packages, if they've got the tools laid out in front of you before you even get back there, that's a bad sign," Merkle said.

Iscoe said anyone performing a piercing should wear gloves and change them several times during each piercing.

And starting Thursday anyone under the age of 18 must provide notarized consent from a parent or legal guardian before getting pierced.

Iscoe said that's just common sense.

"It's not a fashion statement, it's a personal change. You're altering your body," Iscoe said.

Ohio and Indiana already have state regulations for body piercing.

When I was growing up, teenage girls were allowed one and only one ear piercing.

It was not cool for any male to have any kind of piercing. Tattoos were not widely accepted either. People who sported tattoos and body piercing back then were looked upon with some disdain. For the most part, the places that did the tattooing and piercing were not widely accepted either.
Times have changed. Nowadays, from the nose to the toes, it seems like body piercing and tattooing is becoming more popular everyday. At the same time, the tattoo and piercing industry has, for the most part, become regulated. Those regulations have brought up business and sanitation standards to help insure that your son, daughter, husband, wife, father, or mother will receive a quality service without fear of having a bad experience. If you or anyone you know is looking to be pierced, prodded, or poked, look for some of the following standards before you take the plunge:
The Texas Department of Health requires all tattoo and body piercing businesses to be licensed. The business must display the license in a conspicuous place. Tattooists and piercers must also be registered with the Department of Health. Use only a licensed business that employs registered employees. The business must also keep a permanent record of all tattoos and piercings performed. Businesses that perform only ear piercing are exempt from the license and registration requirements.
A person must be at least 18 years of age to receive a tattoo in the State of Texas. Persons younger than 18 may have tattoos that are deemed offensive or questionable removed with the consent of their parents. Parents or guardians may appear with a person who is less than 18 years of age to give their consent. Consent may also be given in the form of an affidavit, however, there are additional requirements that apply in preparation of the affidavit.
A person must also be 18 years of age to receive a body piercing in the State of Texas. Parents may give consent for those younger than 18 by appearing in person with them. Written consent may also be given, however, the process is more restrictive and the consent must specify what part of the body is to be pierced.
Neither the person performing the tattoo or piercing, nor the person receiving the tattoo or piercing can be under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Businesses must also keep their equipment clean and sterile and unused equipment must be kept in clean dust-tight containers.
In addition to these important basic rules, there are a number of administrative rules placed on tattoo and piercing businesses. For more information on existing laws or to file a complaint about a business, contact the Texas Department of Health at 512-424-6500, or visit the Health and Safety Code, Chapter 146 on the internet at www.state.tx.us and the go to laws and statutes section. Make sure your experience with tattooing or piercing is a good one.
For more information on this or any other crime prevention topic, contact the Conroe Police Department Crime Prevention Unit at 756-5588, ext. 2250, 2327 or 2226.

This winter, accessorizing was a no-brainer: don your Uggs, or your Ugg rip-offs, and you immediately scream, "I am absolutely de rigueur." You could be wearing them with ratty sweatpants and a shapeless North Face parka, but the mere fact that you had those Uggs made you hot, right? In the winter, when your feet are your most visible extremity, you can get away with such minimal accessorizing.

But as the weather warms up, you'll need to get a little gutsier. Accessorizing becomes more exciting for the fashionably inclined and more complicated for the fashionably impaired. Now that you're baring more skin, you've got a whole host of new body parts to decorate.

The easiest way for the ladies to get that up-to-the-moment Ugg cache for spring is to max out their jewelry, no longer hidden under hats and scarves. Earrings are gigantic this spring -- they had better hang all the way to your shoulders and be a Day-Glo hue like pink or yellow, or they're not worth wearing. The same goes for bracelets -- they should be big, bright, and plastic. The '80s resurrection attains new heights this spring, which means the more plastic, the better. There is plastic galore at Urban Outfitters, in colorful geometric shapes and giant seashells. Even at Alexia Crawford, where it's been pearls and pearls alone since as far back as anyone can remember, big square bangles and chunky plastic necklaces dominate. So put away your dainty pearls, your chandelier earrings, and -- for the love of God -- your "Return to Tiffany's" ID tags, and get big and bold.

If you are more of an earth child, and the potential tacky factor of plastic is too much for you to stomach, feathers, leather fringe, big open-faced roses, and natural shell and wooden bracelets are also featured in Urban's spring jewelry line. For men's jewelry this spring, the crunchy theme is central. However, my perennial recommendation for gentlemen is to find an original piece of jewelry -- a bracelet, or necklace, preferably from another continent, and just never take it off. This excludes gold chains from Sicily and Abercrombie beads that were MADE IN CHINA. The point is to establish the piece as a signature "I am confident enough in my manhood to wear ethnic jewelry but I am not a metrosexual" token.

Shoes are heading in the same direction as jewelry. Step into Thom Brown on Broadway and you will be assaulted with a rainbow of neon. There is no tasteful brown leather or sensible clogs in their spring offerings. However, once you have resigned yourself to being loud, you have a wide range of choices in terms of style. For those who love Uggs because they are actually comfortable, take advantage of the fact that this year sneakers are truly fashionable for both men and women. These days, a hot pair of yellow Pumas that say, "I'm not trying to be chic" are the chicest thing going. Chuck Taylors, especially high-tops, are making a major comeback. For those who would like to dress it up a bit, look for pumps and sandals in the same Day-Glo colors as the sneaks. Toes are running the gamut from so-pointed-they-curl-up-on-themselves to so-blunt-they-look-amputated. Height is also up for grabs -- flats are just as sexy as spikes this spring. The only potential foot faux-pas to be on guard for is a certain unfortunate conglomeration of all these options: the pointy-toed, spiky neon high-healed boxing sneaker that the stores are still trying to push. In fact, the boxing boots at Thom Brown generally fall flat -- especially the ones in faux Burberry print. At Urban, jelly shoes are back with a bang for 18 bucks. The best bets for men this season have Puma written over all of them, like the orange 'n' cream Velcro Pumas at Thom Brown or the Puma baseball caps at Bottega Giuliana.

Puma and plastic mean that spring is about being bold with your accessories -- sadly, for the diehard prepsters on campus, this is not the season for understated fashion. Both ladies and men should pack away their Patagonia fleece vests and grey New Balances. North Face backpacks should remain library- or wilderness-bound. This means that your beloved J. Crew does not have much to offer the ladies this season in terms of accessories. The ubiquitous wedge flip-flop has flattened out and the socks just aren't that interesting. For men, madras (lightweight, brightly-colored plaid) abounds in the form of hats and boxers.

Now that your head is fully adorned and you've got your rear-end covered, you can turn your attention to everyone's favorite accessory: bags. I said earlier that the backpack's reign has ended. This goes more for ladies than men -- you boys always look cute in nature-prep mode. While some daring girls might be embracing the odd but endearing pants-purses (the bags that are made out of blue jean crotches), you loyal Longchampions can look hip, too, by trading in your classic monochrome tote for Longchamp's new army canvas bookbags. The military look works for both men and women, but for you girls who prefer a more delicate look, lady-like fifties bags, like structured pocketbooks and purses tied up with bows, are hot right now. Be careful with the Jelly Kelly, though -- it's got the bright rubbery boldness of the '80s combined with the sweetness of the '50s, but it is inherently a knockoff -- Hermes would never go near this one.

Though they aren't rampant on campus, I would like to make a plug for scarves -- as one fashionista explained to me, they are making a fantastic transition from winter into spring. Tie a silk scarf around your waist like a handkerchief (one of my favorite ways to wear it), around your head in place of a standard headband, or, my personal choice -- across the bosom for Toad's-worthy lewdness.

So amongst all this plastic, all these Pumas, all these feathers and crotches, is there any accessory that can equal the Ugg? I have my doubts. The real challenge, then, will be how to carry your muddy, worn-out Uggs into spring. I recommend spray-painting them hot pink and coating them in latex.

But really, the question of seasonal trends, especially when it comes to accessories, is a bit ridiculous. I say, wear what you like. My straw purse from Madagascar is definitely not in style, nor are my leopard-print booties from 1999. But I will continue to sport them, along with lots of pearls and maybe even a backpack. Style is yours for the taking at the shops on Broadway, yours for the making with your own creativity.